Dear Mr. Ex President Clinton
Dear Mr. Ex President Clinton:
I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, "Thank me, I voted for
Clinton-Gore." So, I sat down and reflected on that, and I am
sending my "Thank you" for what you have done, specifically:
1. Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones,
Monica Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita
Broderick. Did I leave anyone out?
2. Thank you for teaching my 8 year old about oral sex. I had
really planned to wait until he was a little older to discuss it with
him, but now they know more about it than I did as a senior in college.
3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work
place (especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you
have to know is what the meaning of "is" is. It really is great to know
that certain sexual acts are not sex, and one person may have sex while
the other one does NOT have sex.
4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a
new generation and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the
movie "Wag the Dog" could be plausible after all.
5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford
look graceful, Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look
truthful, and John Kennedy look moral.
6. Thank you for the 73 House and Senate witnesses who have pled the
5th Amendment and 17 witnesses who have fled the country to avoid
testifying about Democratic campaign fund raising.
7. Thank you, for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4
imprisonment's from the Whitewater "mess" and the 55 criminal charges
and 32 criminal convictions (so far) in the other "Clinton" scandals.
8. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, "gutting" much
of our foreign policy, and flying all over the world on "vacations"
carefully disguised as necessary trips.
9. Thank you, also, for "finding" millions of dollars--- I really
didn't need it in the first place, and I can't think of a more well
deserving group of recipients for my hard-earned dollars than jet fuel
for all of your globe-trotting. I understand you, the family and your
cronies have logged in more time aboard Air Force One than any other
administration.
10. Now that you've left the White House, thanks for the 140
pardons of convicted felons and indicted felons-in-exile. We will love
to have them rejoin society. (Not to mention the scores he pardoned
while Governor of Arkansas)
11. Thanks also for removing the White House silverware. I'm sure that
Laura Bush didn't like the pattern anyway. Also, enjoy the housewarming
gifts you've received from your "friends."
12. Thanks to you and your staff in the West Wing of the White
House for vandalizing and destroying government property on the way
out. I also appreciate removing all of that excess weight (China,
silverware, linen, towels, ash trays, soap, pens, magnetic compass,
flight manuals, etc.) out of Air Force 1. The weight savings means
burning less fuel, thus less tax dollars spent on jet fuel. Thank you!
13. And finally, please ensure that Hillary enjoys the $8 million
dollar advance for her upcoming "tell-all" book and you, Bill, the $10
million advance for your memoirs. Who says crime doesn't pay!
14. The last and most important point - thank you for forcing
Israel to let Mohammed Atta go free. Terrorist pilot Mohammed Atta
blew up a bus in Israel in 1986. The Israelis captured, tried and
imprisoned him. As part of the Oslo agreement with the Palestinians in 1993, Israel
had to agree to release so-called "political prisoners". However, the
Israelis would not release any with blood on their hands. The American
President at the time, Bill Clinton, and his Secretary of State, Warren
Christopher, "insisted" that all prisoners be released. Thus Mohammed
Atta was freed and eventually thanked the US by flying an airplane
into Tower One of the World Trade Center. This was reported by many of
the American TV networks at the time that the terrorists were first
identified. It was censored in the US from all later reports. Why
shouldn't Americans know the real truth?
What a guy!! If you agree that the American public must be made aware of these
facts, pass this on. God bless America and THANK YOU (once again) for
spending my taxes so wisely and frugally.
SINCERELY,
A US Citizen
PS. Please pass along a special thank you to Al Gore for
"inventing" the Internet, without which I would not be able to send
this wonderful factual e-mail.
AND THE REST OF THE STORY
Hillary Rodham Clinton, as a New York State Senator, now comes under
the "Congressional Retirement and Staffing Plan," which means that even
if she never gets reelected, she STILL receives her Congressional salary
until she dies. (Would it not be nice if all Americans were pension
eligible after only 4 years?) If Bill outlives her, he then inherits HER salary until HE
dies.
He is already getting his Presidential salary until he dies. If
Hillary outlives Bill, she also gets HIS salary until she dies. Guess
who pays for that?
WE DO!
It's common knowledge that in order for her to establish NY
residency, they purchased a million dollar-plus house in upscale
Chappaqua, New York. Makes sense. They are entitled to Secret Service
protection for life. Still makes sense.
Here is where it becomes interesting. Their mortgage payments
hover at around $10,000 per month. BUT, an extra residence HAD to be
built within the acreage to house the Secret Service agents.
The Clintons charge the Federal government $10,000 monthly rent
for the use of that extra residence, which is just about equal to
their mortgage payment. This means that we, the taxpayers, are paying
the Clinton's salary, mortgage, transportation, safety and security, as
well as the salaries for their 12 man staff -- and, this is all
perfectly legal!
When she runs for President, will you vote for her?